Episode 31: Established Hope Walks By The Spirit

12/1/2019

About The Author

NOTE: The Recordings are in sequence. The File Names Might not seem that way though. I've gotten much better at File Name and keeping order. Learning!

Welcome to my Podcast! My Name is Stephen Dettweiler: I am a Child of The Most High God. I have lived in the Supernatural World my Whole Life! I have experience the great darkness of this ever present evil world through demonic torment and through people being used by the enemy and through life's circumstances.
There has been a great fight for my soul!!
THE DARKNESS
I was Born May 16, 1962. 14 Hours into this Life my Lung Collapsed and they estimated that I was without Oxygen for 20 to 40 Minutes. I was Found Blue.
At 4 and a Half years old, I was tormented by 3 Demons at night. They would walk around my bed and poke me with their fingers and say: This is the one, this is the one.

I was Possessed by 3 demons when I was about 6 years old.

I was Raped, Sodomized and made to have oral sex, by an Episcopal Priest when I was 6 and a half years old.

At age 7 I heard the Voice of Doubt as I was instructed to lay hands on a Def mans ears. I didn't do it. I made the waitress brought his coffee, instead. The Voice of Darkness overwhelmed the Voice of Light.

At age 10 I was made to give oral sex to a camp counselor and then raped, Sodomized by him.

At age 8 started smoking cigarettes and by 13 I was self medicating with alcohol, and any substance I could get my hands on.

I experienced my Dad going down the road of Alcoholism and losing everything by the time I was 16 and I went out on my own on my 16th Birthday. My Mother Fell into Prescription Drugs and essentially checked out years before that. Such Darkness!!!!

From age 16 to 21 I felt such Darkness and Pressure trying to live on my own while trying to also support my Parents Financially.

Age 17/18 faced going to Prison for 7 to 15 Years for a Felony that I was not purposefully evolved in.

At 21 had to Bail out my Dad from Jail for passing bad checks. For me this was the last straw that lead me to suicide.

At age 27 I met the one woman I had kept my virginity for. I only loved one woman in my life and only had one relationship in my life. I was passionately in love with my wife. I got Married forever at least that's what I thought. I was led back into Smoking Pot and enticed back into Pornography. These two combined put me in an emotional state of separation from my wife due to the guilt and condemnation I felt. This emotional Separation from her sent her into the arms of another man and on Good Friday 1998 first thing in the morning, She told me She didn't Love me anymore and perhaps she never did.
This struck deep into my heart as I dropped to my knees and confessed to smoking pot. But, even at that Moment the shame of the Pornography I could not speak.
She said: If you had told me that before I told you I was leaving, I would have worked it out with you. But, now I'm leaving. I found someone who is like you used to be. I'm not coming Back.
This Traumatic experience changed my life forever at age 36.
I ended up in the Hospital dying of Broken Heart syndrome. The Doctors told my brother that: If I didn't decide to live, there was nothing they could do. The Great Darkness Overwhelmed me.
I was at The End of This Life, Once Again!

I worked for the Ministry that The Lord told me to go to work for. After 5 years I was blindsided and let go from this position. I was devistated. Let go Febuary 4th 2004.
Buy September of 2004 I was degected, rejected dispondent, disappointed and hurt, while riding on my mower at one of my lawn customers, I told God The Father that I did not Trust Him any more and wanted nothing more to do with him...…

From 2012 through 2016 Ministry was taking place. Starting with a Bible Study at Wendy's. With my most faithful supportive friend, Michael. I could not have ask for a greater friend and support in Ministry then Michael!
in February of 2013, we were given a large former Mechanics Garage to remodel into a 50 seat Sanctuary.

Ending with My Friend Michael Passing May 1, 2016 which was devastating to me. Three days later, People showed up and put a Bid on the Church Property. The Owners of The Property that had been donating it for the use of the Church accepted the offer.
I was, the Church was evicted end of July.
These events Spirialed me down into a deep dark depression. I had given so much of my ohysical and spiritual life to this Church Project and All at Once it Was Gone!
For me, everything was, gone! Inside me I had nothing left. My Hope was differed and it made my Heart Sick! By End of May 2017 a Heart without Hope and I was seriousely Considering Suicide.
THIS NEXT SECTION UNDERCONSTRUCTION! JUST KNOW THAT THE LIGHT WILL ALWAYS OVERCOME THE DARKNESS!!

NOW FOR THE LIGHT OF HOPE! THE REST OF THE STORY!!
The Light of Our Lord and King; indeed our Father has Continually come and Decimated the darkness of the enemy!
I was supposed to die at 14 hours old in 1962. The only Surgeon that could preform the experimental surgery at the time was from N.Y. He had preformed this surgery on a 4 year old. And now called upon to preform it on a 14 hour old. This Doctor just happen to be at my N.J. Hospital at the right time!! He Told my Parents that the chances of me living were next to nothing. And if I lived I would be a Vegetable due to not having Oxygen to my Brain for an estimated 40 minutes. My Dad by Faith in Jesus and what he knew as an Episcopal Priest Baptized me with Holy Water on the way into surgery and on the way out.
Now don't write me letters on proper Baptism. I understand Proper Baptism, submersion, age of choice etc. What I do Know is that God will meet you where your Faith is. He is Love is Full of Grace and Mercy!
It is Obvious, that I did not die and I am not a vegetable. I do appear to operate in this world very well. What people don't see is the daily Struggle of Learning. The Faith fight is daily. The Daily Struggle of knowing how to deal with emotions. The Daily Struggle to Connect to People.
I didn't even learn how to learn to read until 5th Grade.

When Demons came upon me only hate and destruction would fly out of my emotions. Due to the Rapes by men, I haven't been able to really connect with another person in emotional intimacy my whole life. That is what brought the end to my marriage 21 years ago. I Have not had a relationship sense.
By the time I was 3 years old my Mother became very physically abusive towards me and that's when my Dad started taking me everywhere he went. At that time he was still in the Ministry and was a Chaplain at a Prison and the Mental Ward of The Hospital.
I still remember 2 occurrences of Light when I was 3.
1. Prison Ministry with my Dad: Imagine 1965 walking down the long corridor with dim lights and concrete walls. as you walked down the hall to your left was a small office with nothing more than a desk and chair and a Filing Cabinet. I was sitting in the Chair, while my Dad was off doing Prison Ministry. There was a Guard there to watch me. I remember this Big Black Guard coming into the Office and leaning over asked me: Are you going to be a Preacher like your Father?
I said: Yes I am!
2. I was with my Dad at the Psychiatric wing of the Hospital.
Judging by our Congress we need to reinstitute and fund these Psych wards once again. But, I digress.
I was in the Psych ward with my Dad 3 yrs old and sitting on a ladies lap. My Dad said: Come on. It's time to go.
As I started to get off the ladies lap she said: you're a good little boy.
The Significance to that was: She had not spoken one word in 20 years. Truly the Move of The Light of God in the darkness of her world.

When I was 4 Years Old, I was sitting in a pew, center, second to the front with Mrs. Miller. My Dad was Preaching and at that time I left my body and was in Heaven.

Episode 31: Established Hope Walks By The Spirit

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